Target “Solution” Adds Uncertainty to Bathroom Etiquette

There’s an interesting controversy contrast between two of America’s leading retailers. Walmart controversies typically occur out in the parking lot and are signaled by raised voices or the occasional gunshot.

Walmart executive involvement is normally limited to calling 9–1–1.

chuck-norris-man-in-womans-bodyTarget controversies take place inside and are kicked off when an ever–vigilant socialist media commissar spots a political correctness violation. Target honchos actively participate in both the cause and the occasional apology.

A few of Target’s more recent sensibility offenses include:

  • A T–shirt boasting the word “Trophy” on the front. (I think the fact it didn’t come in XXX–Large had something to do with it, too.)
  • A Christmas T–shirt that read: “OCD Obsessive Christmas Disorder.”
  • Another T–shirt that replaced Princess Leia with Luke Skywalker.
  • A Photoshopped swimsuit ad that gave a young girl a “thigh gap” and an arm long enough for an Orangutan.

Customers should have gotten an inkling Target wasn’t content to confine the outrage to haberdashery when the “Boy’s Bedding” signs were changed to “Kid’s Bedding” and other departments were put on notice by the company newsletter that, “our teams are working across the store to identify areas where we can phase out gender-based signage to help strike a better balance.”

Fortunately those uproars were mostly optional. The Angel of Outrage passed over if you didn’t buy the T–shirt and you could always purchase Roscoe’s Star Wars sheets at Walmart. Assuming you made it through the parking lot.

Target’s latest internally–generated outrage has the potential to affect any customer who just finished a Big Gulp prior to shopping. Bulk bathrooms —that serve more than one customer simultaneously — are now gender fluid. Nathans who feel nelly can enter the bathroom of their choice.

Target PR flacks assured the Washington Post that some customers “are really supportive.” I suppose that includes the Idaho man arrested in a female fitting room — he was feeling frilly that day — while he took photos of the woman in changing in the next cubicle.

Personally I’ve always felt anyone was welcome to join me in the men’s room if you can use the urinal without sitting in it.

Others are less supportive.

The American Family Association decided this was the straw that broke the toilet paper dispenser. It launched a nationwide #BoycottTarget campaign in response to what it termed a “dangerous” bathroom and changing room policy. In no time at all women threw down their “Trophy” T–shirts and demanded Target conduct its outreach to the mentally ill in a location that didn’t involve baring your behind.

Normally, trendy retailers consider offending Christians one of the perks of being in business. What fun is it if you can’t poke the Bible–beaters in the eye once in a while? I’ll bet it was was all Baptists and tranny jokes in the break room until the sales figures rolled in.

Home Depot had “robust earnings” and the National Retail Federation “revised its forecasts upward.” In contrast, Target sales down by 7.2 percent and foot traffic declined for the first time in two years.

The only area to show any increase was online sales, where customers are pretty sure who is sharing the bathroom with them.

Did the Christians finally win one? Did the almost 1.5 million signers of the boycott petition make a difference?

Target says no. “It’s difficult to tease out one thing that’s driving results.” But if that’s the case why is Target now spending $20 million to add one–holer bathrooms to all its stores? These bathrooms are specifically designed to accommodate female shoppers who don’t want to play stall roulette.

The only downside I see is most American’s aren’t prepared for a return to 1960’s gas station bathroom etiquette. Back then there was many a time when I’d shot the bolt on a restroom door only to be interrupted shortly thereafter by a tentative jiggling of the door handle.

What to do? Maintain a discrete silence and hope they go away? Try to concentrate on the business at hand and clear out quickly? Before I could make up my mind they usually escalated by knocking.

Now I’m wondering: What are they thinking? The door is obviously locked. If it locked accidentally, knocking isn’t going to solve their problem. And since the bathroom is occupied, do they expect me say, “Hey, come on in, I’ll slide over and you can join me!”

Target runs the risk of today’s unfamiliar customers being so deferential they cross their legs and wait in agony before a door that’s merely closed.

Maybe the situation calls for another T–shirt, this time reading: “I used the bathroom at Target & survived!”

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Doctors Bury Their Mistakes, Politicians Bury Taxpayers

Obamacare is a typical Democrat, Big Government program: It expands the scope of government, it’s expensive, it’s built on a foundation of lies and it does the exact opposite of what it promised.

A Republican takeover of the Senate this year is our only hope of stopping the hilariously named ACA in it’s tracks.

The latest update on the failures of Obamacare are in my Newsmax Insider column at: http://tinyurl.com/o89ub8x

 

House GOP Doesn’t Listen Any Better than Walmart

New GOPOccasionally the wrong person takes a column to heart.

Earlier this month I wrote that Walmart doesn’t help its PR efforts when the company acts in a manner that only serves to reinforce its reputation as the Simon Legree of retail. (Details here.) In this instance an Ohio store had a display in the employee break room asking for donations to help other Walmart employees that had fallen on hard times during the Thanksgiving & Christmas season.

Asking employees who earn an average of $12.83/hour to contribute to other employees is a touching testimony to the innate decency of the Walmart workforce, but it also calls up unfortunate images of the widow’s mite particularly in comparison with the wealth of the Walton family.

The column concluded with a look at Walmart’s Associates in Critical Need Trust. This is a fund that dispenses up to $1,500 to employees suffering severe financial setbacks. (This does not include a bad losing streak in connection with the Powerball lottery.)

I liked the sound of that, until I learned that once again these donations are no skin off the Walton family’s stock certificates. This trust is funded by voluntary payroll deduction, again from the $12.83/hour employees.

And that’s when problems began at the Shannon household.

My wife announced that unless the Walton family stops being so selfish (they have $144 billion in Walmart stock) and makes a major contribution to the Trust we will be boycotting Walmart. Generally I have no problem with boycotts. It’s an individual decision that uses the market to bring pressure on a merchant. No government intervention required. Colonists did it during the run up to the Revolution.

For taste and political reasons, I never darken the door of Starbucks (homosexual marriage is “part of the corporate DNA”), Caribou Coffee (Sharia–compliant finance) or Chipotle (one of the nation’s leading employers of illegals).

On the other hand I’m also cheap, so I regularly shop at Walmart, in spite of linguistic encounters with Walmart employees that graphically illustrate what retail shopping is going to be like after John Boehner decides it’s safe to grant illegals amnesty.

The wife says Target is going to be the windfall beneficiary of Shannon shopping dollars in the future. But I have mixed emotions regarding that store, too. All too often in the Sunday advertising circular the clothes younger models wear contribute to the sexualization of tweenaged shoppers. Young girls are hard enough to shop for without major retailers urging them to dress like pint–sized Kim Kardashians.

This is not a problem encountered when viewing the frumpy models in a Walmart catalog. I don’t know for certain whom it is wearing those dowdy clothes, but most of them appear to be related to Fred and Ethel Mertz. Regardless of age there are no sex symbols in a Walmart catalog.

Besides the Target food section is mostly full of do–it–yourself yogurt mixes and it is about one third the size of Walmart’s. (Although, credit where credit is due, Target does carry Malt–O–Meal.) I do hate sneaking around behind my wife’s back. The fact that my future secret assignations are with a major retail chain and not a hoochie mama is probably a commentary on the dullness of my existence, but I plan to continue to visit Walmart.

On the other hand I won’t be visiting Republican members of the Virginia House delegation. Last week I wrote about the shameful Boehner/Ryan sellout they tried to spin as a “budget deal.” (Details here.) This capitulation raises taxes (fees), increases spending and negates the sequester.

Ryan is so proud of himself. The good congressman says he’s increased Pentagon spending by $2 billion, which means all the Coffee Colonels there can go back to using the Keurig instead of making do with Nescafe. In return for all this bounty Ryan agreed to let the Democrats increase their spending by $22 billion! That’s an 11 to 1 ratio and we’re on the short side.

GOP apologists talk about future spending cuts contained in the deal, but with these big spenders the cuts always remain in the future, just over the horizon, like a mirage.

You can’t bind a future Congress to a deal made today. Heck this Congress can’t even bind itself. Who do you think negotiated the original sequester?

Now Boehner is flush with positive MSM coverage and has declared war on the TEA party. He’s tired of having Obama hand him his hat, so the great strategist turns on his base. Now maybe Karl Rove will return his phone calls.

At times like this the favorite criticism of the TEA party centers on Senate candidates. The TEA party supported candidates that lost and that cost Republicans the Senate.

Establishment Republicans never foist a loser on the electorate. Just look at the great work being done by President Romney and Senator George Allen. Not to mention that paragon of tanning, Senator Charlie Crist from Florida. All these worthies are (or were, Crist became a Democrat this year) establishment Republicans with the full support of party elders.

The TEA party is not a monolithic closed structure resistant to outside ideas — wait that sounds like Boehner’s cabal — it’s a loosely affiliated collection of like–minded conservatives and tin foil distributors. (Just kidding.)

There is no national body that selects candidates. Local groups support local candidates.

The TEA party–backed candidate lost in Missouri because establishment Republicans in that state utilize a primary system that doesn’t have a runoff if no one gets 50 percent of the vote. That’s how Todd Akin becomes your nominee with fewer than 35 percent of the vote. Akin and his gynecological theories could have never won a runoff. The TEA party candidate would not have survived the primary if Missouri Republicans ran the party like Texas Republicans.

In Delaware, Christine O’Donnell was simply mislabeled. She would have had no problem winning as a Democrat. If Patty Murray of budget deal negotiating fame can win her first race running as “a mom in tennis shoes,” O’Donnell would have had few problems as “a mom who’s not a witch.”

Country club Republicans conveniently overlook the fact that TEA party energy is responsible for Boehner sitting in the Speaker’s chair today.

This wretched budget deal has now passed the Senate where Republicans with primary opponents voted against it as a sop to people like you and me. There was never a doubt as to House passage. If you want to see how your house member voted you can check here and here.

I’m sorry to say the deal passed with every GOP member from Virginia voting ‘yes.’ These Republicans are either too timid to vote conservative or they simply aren’t conservatives.

Regardless of the reason for their failure, I’ll be happily boycotting every one of these politicians until they’re out of office. No money and no votes from the Shannon household and I urge every conservative reading this to do likewise.

This is a boycott every conservative can get behind.